May 16 is reckoned worldwide as The International Day of the Boy Child. Although it may have passed without much pomp and color, I dedicate this space today to share my reflections on the kind of world the modern man lives in, the challenges he faces and what we can do to ensure the young boys grow up in a dignified environment.
It is said that perceptions shape our view of reality and yes, the society’s evolving view of the man is undeniably worrying. Challenging the man’s usefulness is now a common place discussion not only in social circles but also in mainstream media. But perhaps the most shocking is the constant rhetoric that goes unchallenged – one that is degrading, demeaning and indicative of utmost loathe and unmatched vitriol against half of the world’s population.
After all, vilifying men is seemingly an acceptable practice, where phrases such as, “Men are trash and Men are dogs are normalized.” Therefore, should we reckon it a wonder when the increasing deaths of young men through suicide on account of failed romantic pursuits doesn’t awaken a jot of sympathy in the society? Or who feels sorry for the garbage they dumped in the heap as it melts in the scorching sun? It’s unwanted and undesirable. Why care about how it degenerates! Or who feels tons of empathy for those mongrels knocked down by over speeding vehicles along the highway? They got what they wanted by attempting to cross a busy road, isn’t it?
Hence begs the question: What is a man? For clarity, when I talk of men in this context, I use the term loosely in reference to self-respecting, peace-loving, law-abiding humans who identify as male and use the pronouns he/him. Well, men are not emotionless mannequins to be tossed about and turned around at anyone’s whim and will. Men are not cash cows or blank checks to fund someone’s endless fantasies and incalculable wants. Men are not saints or angels who run errands on earth during the day only to reside in holy bliss at night. Yes, men are fallible and sometimes gullible. Yet this fact alone doesn’t warrant for the blanket condemnation and consistent demonization.
On the contrary, men are thought leaders, opinions shapers and their strength is the bedrock of society’s civilization. Show me a community where the man’s position is trivialized and I’ll show you a community that’s on the brink of imminent collapse. Men are human beings born without value. They have to work hard to prove themselves to everyone. In the man’s world, meritocracy is the basic order while sweat and blood is the currency for nothing comes on a silver platter. Their lonely lives are accustomed to challenging obstacles and have to suffer as per the dictates of Adam’s curse. Interestingly, men’s resources are eyed and demanded (or should I say ripped off) by those around him – wives, children, extended family, the church, goons, not forgetting the police and government.
I hope that every man reading this, especially the young men aged between 18 and 25 understand that suffering losses doesn’t signal the end of the world. At some point in life, you’ll most likely lose hard earned cash on volatile crypto or fake scams; you’ll most probably experience a terrible heartbreak for making the mistake of trying to negotiate desire with a woman. Men need to break the shame and normalize speaking more openly about the losses when assembled in their cliques – not in a sob style as if desirous of consolation and validation, but in a bro style as a gentle reminder that such is life.
Young fella out there, you are not the first one to simp and see dust or suffer monetary losses. True, it’s not something you are proud of but still should never be a pretext for ending your life. For heaven’s sake, don’t make your ancestors turn while in the grave for doing something stupid. They didn’t fight so hard for our independence and freedom only for you to trifle with it. Chin up and brave up as you lick your wounds. Thereafter, go forth and set your mind to conquer more in future laden with wisdom garnered from personal or shared experiences.
Finally, the solutions to most of the men’s problems, issues that so tax his mind and risk jeopardizing his mental health are usually hidden in books. As the old adage puts it, “Knowledge is power.” You have no excuse to wallow in incompetence or bask in ignorance. Grab ’em books and learn from the experiences of fellow men. A good starter park would include, The Rational Male series by Rollo Tomassi, 50 Memos to Men by Silas Nyanchwani, the Unplugged series by Jacob Aliet and the Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel.
Gladly, droves of men have realized the essence of this subject and are now fully woke. Thus, the change so direly needed is no longer a far-fetched dream. I hope that we will ensure our sons and grandsons find a better world to live in, one that was intentionally crafted by their mindful predecessors; a world free of shame where all boys enjoy and express their masculinity within the bounds of reason and morality.
Cheers, good people.
The Cleaver 
These are my two cents from the article:
Show me a community where the man’s position is trivialized and I’ll show you a community that’s on the brink of imminent collapse.
Men are human beings born without value. They have to work hard to prove themselves to everyone. In the man’s world, meritocracy is the basic order while sweat and blood is the currency for nothing comes on a silver platter.
Thanks @Jefferson for such a deep reflection on the lives of our endangered species.
LikeLiked by 1 person